The Wall (Riverside Park) – Mike “Photon” Bauer

Backblast: January 22nd, 2026

AO: The Wall – Riverside Park – Perrysburg, OH

PAX:
Photon – Q
Big Spoon
Carmen Sandiego
Coconut
Finkle
Guardian
Longhorn
Mile High
Rumor
Spaulding
Ukulele

Workout: Cardiovascular Punishment

FNG’s: N/A

Mission and Principles:
F3: Fitness, Fellowship, Faith
Mission: To plant, grow and serve small workout groups for men for the invigoration of male community leadership.
The core principles of F3 are that it is always:
1. Free of charge
2. Open to all men
3. Held outdoors, rain or shine, heat or cold
4. Led by men who participate in the workout in a rotating fashion, with no training or certification necessary. You versus you. Modify or stop an exercise if you need to. The most important thing is that nobody gets hurt.
5. Ends with a Circle of Trust
Credo: Leave no man behind but leave no man where you find him

Warm-up: In Cadence

Side-Straddle Squirrel Jacks: 10

The “Thang”:

10 reps of 5 exercises per round, repeat for 12 rounds or until time.

4-ct. High Knees 10
Burpees 10
4-ct. Mt. Climbers 10
8-ct. Body Builder Burpees 10
4-ct. SSHs 10

Ended with:
Count-O-Rama: 11
Name-O-Rama

The Six – Carmen Sandiego

LDP3

Ball of Man

Spreadsheets from the Gloom: A warm 25F with a 15F windchill. This was an absolute grind. Goal was cardiovascular punishment, and we got what we bargained for. This one was extremely punishing. You could argue that this was worse than just doing burpees with an EMOM…because there was no break. Your burpee break was mountain climbers, which somehow ended up being the worst exercise of the bunch. After every round of climbers I just wanted to stay curled over on the ground…like a bad PTSD episode post Thor’s sleds at The Fortress. Body builder burpees never felt so good. Amazing how much of a reprieve that plank jack felt.

All in all this was loaded out pretty well. Enough variety in exercises to be doable and just long enough for the humans amongst us. Coconut just finished the 12th round when time was called, with Spaulding, Ukulele, and YHC a round behind him. And then there was Big Spoon… What an absolute monster. Guy got into the 14th round somehow…destroying my planning that 12 rounds would be enough. That’s over 260 burpees in 36 minutes…plus the SSHs and the mountain climbers and the high knees. Incredible performance that will raise the bar even further the next time around.

Personally, I thought this was one of my best playlists to date…high energy tracks from big names that chronicled the feelings of the beatdown…but initial feedback from Coconut suggested otherwise. I did get a compliment from Guardian though; so that counts for something.

“Pumpin’ It Up (Cosmic Flutie Medley)” – Stevie Salas
“Beat It” – Michael Jackson
“Blood” – Pearl Jam: Live in Seattle 12/8/93
“Bleed Together” – Soundgarden
“Black Hearts (On Fire)” – Jet
“Savior Breath” – Foo Fighters
“Harder To Breathe” – Maroon 5
“War Within A Breath” – Rage Against The Machine
“Breathe” – Nickleback
“Heartbreaker” – Led Zeppelin: Life at the Paris Theater 1/4/71

I mean, come on! The last lyrics of the playlist were “Heartbreaker!” “Heartbreaker!’ “Heart!”

The format of this one will be back. A mixed-bag of cardio slog that slams the pedal to the floor. It will likely be back with some different exercise in the future. Hope to see you there.

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